A joke my 9 year old made up: How do you get poop on your sister's forehead? He goes into a bar and orders a shot. Did you know the toothbrush was invented in Brazil 43. Instead of actively looking for work, he likes to sit around at home. She replied, "Well we just had sex so what's the big difference?". Before the procedure a very attractive nurse comes in and takes his vitals, then tells him to take all of his clothes off. A lone camel driver was about to embark on a long journey west of the Sahara into Egypt. He packed everything he could imagine for the trip, which was to last a few months. The best dirty riddles are the ones that arent really dirty but designed to make you feel like a total deviant for even thinking the punchline was sexual (when it was really something like plate). Its common wisdom as old as your grandmother after a child has had strep throat, flu or some other similar infection, its important to throw away that contaminated old toothbrush and get a new one. If he was from anywhere else it would be called a teethbrush. 9. I also ask that you spit and not swallow. I am always hard when dry but smooth and soft when wet. IE 11 is not supported. You might not need to throw away that toothbrush after a sore throat, a new study shows. You look like the world is about to collapse.". An even bigger surprise they tested two brand-new, unused toothbrushes as a control. Whats the difference between amazing sex and this joke? 21. Buying new toothbrushes every 3 months is expensive! ur not ashamed of urdelf. My business is briefs. 8 years ago I shared the worst joke I've ever made. 69. We're talking dirty knock knock jokes, dirty jokes, and sex jokes that would have gotten us at least a week's worth of detention. My wife and I were watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed. Me: No, Steven is my roommate. Because anywhere else it would've been called a teethbrush. otherwise it would have been called the teethbrush. Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the head on a man's penis is larger than the shaft. Q: What did the dentist say to a golfer with a cavity? Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Jokes Etc / Dirty Toothbrush (1457 Views), "Hilarious Pic" You Found Out Your Grandfather used your toothbrush / (Image).Laugh To The Toothbrush And Tissue Paper / I Luv My Toothbrush (2) (3) (4), He Isn't Even Ur Father: Funny / . A: In the morning a rooster says, more We love good humor and obviously hilarious jokes followed by a healthy laughter! A: The shopping trolley has a mind of its own! The man kicks it in the nose. 34. It turns out that one is a highly respected dentist and the other can't seem to keep a job. What is 6 inches long, hard, goes into your mouth back and fourth, and has white stuff at the end. .. he picks up two apples, a toothbrush, a bag of birdseeds, a bottle of wine, and large pack of batteries. ", "Very good!" Doctor: Huh, so is Stevens a foreign brand? Hi there thir, my names Jotheph, and I was curiouth. The toothbrush was invented in the South Q: What kind of filling did the little boy want for his cavity? The best part about getting older is enjoying lascivious content we would have gotten in trouble for back in high school. That long handle and fine bristles are tailor-made to handle certain kitchen chores better than a sponge or scrub brush can. Submitted by Dentist Scott Eisen, DDS, Catonsville Dental Care, Catonsville, Maryland. just last night I heard her using an electric toothbrush for what seemed like an hour, Did you know the toothbrush was invented in Arkansas? Whos the most popular girl at the nudist colony? During this time, you must sell an average of at least 100 units per week. Think about it: Laughing would be a fun distraction while we wait for our name to be called. All those jokes about Alabama, but no one acknowledges his contributions, like inventing the toothbrush. 54Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland. Whos the most popular guy at the nudist colony? 47. 50. PWK - PUNYA BACKINGAN OM DED!? What is it? If he was from anywhere else it would be called a teethbrush. Because anywhere else it would've been called a teethbrush. I'm giving up on those electric toothbrushes. Q: Why did the patient start shouting after he left the dentist? Vote. The doctor warned him, though, that there was a slight bug in the machine that caused it to amplify the pain sent to the father by ten times, and if the pain became too much for to bear would he please let the doctor know. I come in a lot of different sizes. They should be thoroughly rinsed, and replaced every three to four months --mostly because they become frayed and less effective. Q: Why does your tongue hate going to the dentist? Plenty of water, food, first aid kit, even three toothbrushes for the whole trip. The man quickly agreed. The couple took the new baby home. Im the highlight of many dates. 38. Getting down and dirty with your hoes 3. One day, a speechless man named Joseph enters a toothbrush factory. For an optimal experience visit our site on another browser. I don't remember her eating fish for lunch. Q: Why should you be kind to your dentist? Have you heard that Oral-B and Queen Latifah are making a toothbrush together? If it had been invented anywhere else it would be called a teethbrush. Submitted by orthodontist Kami Hoss, D.D.S., M.S., co-founder of The Super Dentists, California. If it had been invented somewhere else they would have called it the teethbrush. Whats made of rubber, handed out at some schools, and exists to prevent mistakes? The boss liked him and decided to give him a chance. Because anywhere else it would have been called a teethbrush. Its called clean-ya-teefah! 127. How do you know that the toothbrush was invented in Maine? A traveling salesman hires a stutterer to sell toothbrushes A guy goes shopping and buys a banana, 2 eggs and a toothbrush. said the teacher, "And you .. he takes out two apples, a toothbrush, a bag of birdseed, a bottle of wine and a large pack of batteries. If it was invented anywhere else it would have been called a teethbrush." Vote: 1 votes. Husband: It was a surprise but remember that pink Lamborghini you wanted so badly? You get t, One day, a man with a lisp named Joseph walks into a toothbrush factory. And of course there is a little girl in the front, raising her hand. So that yaks will disobey them! Its my job to stuff your box. 21. 70. It's possible the child was a so-called strep carrier -- someone who carries the bacteria without showing any ill-effects, she said. 48. 19. Q: Why did the vampires breath stink so badly? You guys know how the toothbrush was invented in the south? 23. The hiring manager says "We sell toothbrushes. RELATED: 20 Chemistry Jokes Every Science Nerd Will Appreciate. In order to prove he can do the job, the man is given a box of 100 toothbrushes, and told to come back when he's sold them all. So Shepards team set up a series of studies first making sure that it is possible to even culture bacteria off toothbrushes it is and then trying to simulate a real-life test. 3. That really surprised us, Shepard said in a telephone interview. The manager comes out and greets Joseph. 18. this jokeit couldcontain profanity. To his surprise, the man returns with all the money within an hour. 55. I am dirty, people like to put their wood in me, but only Santa goes down on me. The third one says, "I wanna be a boxer." Each day, two of the guys sell twenty toothbrushes each, and the third guy consistently sells two hundred. He hadn't missed anything. says the second guy. A: Put your money where your mouth is. If it was invented in any other state, it would have been called a teethbrush. 125. "No way -- you already broke yours off! The salesman, skeptical of this random persons sales ability, agreed that if the man could sell 100 toothbrushes in a day, that he could have the job. Otherwise it would have been called a teethbrush. My dentist gives me a new toothbrush at every check-up, which is good because I keep it if a woman stays overnight. Q: What did the tuba player buy at the drug store? 1. My dad bought me a Sonicare toothbrush New jokes are added daily. I don't remember her eating fish for lunch. I just noticed that my new electric toothbrush is not waterproof. What am I? 63. Q: Why does the dental staff go to the dentist with their problems? Toothbrush moustache: The toothbrush moustache is a moustache style.The sides of the moustache are vertical (or nearly vertical) rather than tapered, giving the moustache hairs . I dropped it in the toilet last week.' 18. 70+ Dirty Riddles For Adults That Are Actually Totally Innocent. A single child who wasnt sick had Strep A on her toothbrush, Shepard says. The interviewer is stunned. Not Eligible To Win. Im a cunning linguist. Year after year, he can repeatedly sell the most toothbrushes out of everyone who works for the company, at least tripling the the amount of sales the guy trailing him has made. One day the toothbrush got tired and said "Damn, I have the dirtiest job in the whole world". Submitted by orthodontist Kami Hoss, D.D.S., M.S., co-founder of The Super Dentists, California. The first day the manger send them out for their first try at selling toothbrushes. RELATED: 101 Short Jokes Anyone Can Remember. Ill fill your holes when you ask me to. What is about 6 inches long, hard, hairy at the base, and is pushed into a wet orifice where it is moved back and forth rapidly? An expensive piece of tail, I come with a large pair. What am I? Dad! Whats long and hard when its young and soft and small when its old? In that time you need to sell at least 100 units on average each week. Its not like a true health hazard but you should be aware when you take it out its not sterile, she said. Why you should never brush your teeth with your left hand. Returning visitor? A toothbrush salesman is tasked with selling his product at the mall. When I come, its news. 124. Im especially responsive when you put your fingers deep inside me. .. 123 Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a toothbrush? The Toothbrush Salesman | sports | Jokes.com, Jokes - Funny Jokes, Dirty Jokes, Blonde Jokes, Clean Jokes, Racial Jokes, How do you know that the toothbrush was invented . 'My toothbrush fell into the toilet!' Lets get you another one, I said, throwing it away. How do you know the toothbrush was invented in Kentucky? The doctor looked her over and told them it would be a rather difficult delivery. Q: What did the Dentist of the Year get? What we ended up doing was devising a way to collect real kids toothbrushes, Shepard said. You sometimes do it with yourself if you need to, but its a lot better when its with other people. What am I? 20. What do you insert in a small hole and twist all the way around? 60. This is your secret? But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first, the shed, the boat. If it was invented anywhere else it would have been called the "Teethbrush.". Then he goes to his father a, Better be the last time I see one of those bastards on my rommates toothbrush, One eager child says, "Daddy says to cover my mouth when I cough because my cold is contagious!". 4. Doctor: What toiletries are you using? A: The blonde has the higher sperm count. If you achieve this goal, you will be hired full-time. 62. Monday at school, the teacher lined up all the students and had them present their weekend homework: their assignment was to sell something and give a presentation on effective salesmanship. I assist with erections. You probably haven't heard most of them. TIL that the toothbrush was made in Arkansas. Teacher: "Can anyone tell me where the toothbrush was invented?" Little Johnny: "In Kentucky. Q: Why is it sometimes necessary to get a second opinion from a dentist? When it is her turn to pay at the checkout, the pretty cashier takes a quick look at the man's purchases and then looks back at the man. 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When the bill comes, Mike, Dave and John will do it You meet this toothbrush salesman, you ask for a job and you end up getting it. A guy loses his job and is really down on his luck. Answer: Not as much as you think You might not need to throw away that toothbrush after a sore throat, a new study shows Featurepics.com SAVE Create your free. How can you tell the inventor of the toothbrush was from West Virginia? What am I? ', buhahhaha lol @feelgood for sure am really feeling good, I regret to announce that the the unfortunate dad in this story is no other than ITUEN. / On Top Dis Subsidy Matter, Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10). You get a lot of it if youre important and successful; you get less when youre just starting out. A penguin takes his car to the shop and the mechanic says it'll take about an hour for him to check it. Q: What does a dentist do when the plane lands? All I wanted was to give you something." He doesn't trust talking fish. Q: What's the difference between a blond having her period and a terrorist? What is the latest invention from the UA Engineering program? I start with a p and end with o-r-n. Im a major player in the film industry. Ech! 36. The kids filed back into class Monday morning.. 3 men apply for a sales job at toothbrush company. Never having to buy another electric toothbrush. "I sold Girl Scout cookies and made $30. Its never what you expect it to be and forces you to reevaluate the way you think (which is filthy, BTW). So I just said 'Hey, if YOU have a better way to get dogshit out of sneakers', "Because then every time she puts it in her mouth, she'll think of you.". I guess he just wanted me to know. 38. Instead of actively looking for work, he likes to sit at home. What am I? I told her, "This is disgusting!" Toothbrush: A toothbrush is an oral hygiene instrument used to clean the teeth, gums, and tongue.It consists of a head of tightly clustered bristles, atop of which . The interviewer is dumbfounded. The hiring manager says "We sell toothbrushes. She said, Yes I will marry you and learn to live with your infant penis. How do you control your anger? Because anywhere else it would have been called a teethbrush. I get wet before you do. Had it been invented anywhere else, they would have called it the teethbrush. This tastes like shit! A doctor came to the mental hospital to visit his patients. Down on his luck and very desperate, he asks to speak to the manager of the facility, about getting a job as a toothbrush salesman. Such kind of jokes could bring a smile on anyone's face or could crack them up in a knotty situation. I don't mind using my roommate's toothbrush. When the results of the French study were released, Canada decided to conduct their own study. Q: Whats another name for a dentists office? It, therefore, demands that you think of your options carefully before jumping to answering them. During their vocabulary session the teacher begins her lesson with the word Contagious. If it was invented anywhere else, it would have been called a teeth brush. The toothbrushes came two to a pack, so we took one and the kids got to keep one. she always keeps her cool. Follow her on Instagram @lisamariewrites4food and Twitter @cornish_conklin. Finally, she thought of a clever way to get her point across.One day when I got home I found her sitting in the long grass mowing A dentist conducted a worldwide survey*"How long do you use your toothbrush?"*. Otherwise it would have been called "the teethbrush.". To which Jane replies, "If I'd known you had more time, I would have taken off my pantyhose!". There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. A guy walks in the local whorehouse, says "I want the cheapest one you got, I don't have much money." Throw in a lawn sprinkler! A dirty joke is a joke that is usually considered inappropriate because of its indecent punchline. And, she says, toothbrushes don't really dry out overnight, so it it not unrealistic to think someone could be re-infected by a contaminated toothbrush. Well, I have a prostate exam coming up. Dont bother, the researchers advise. 36. The doctor asked the man: "What are you doing, walking the dog?" 37. I just got a job and am moving there soon. If it was from somewhere else they would call it a toothbrush! We dont blame you. Click here for more information. Whats beautiful and natural but gets long and prickly if it isnt trimmed regularly? Q: Why did the doughnut go to the dentist? 122. Alabama. Q: Why does the ant hang out at the bakery? I don't remember her eating fish for lunch. What three-letter word starts with an s, ends with x, and has a vowel in the middle? 53. 4. Dad! The boss liked him and decided to give him a shot. Anywhere else theyd have called it a teethbrush. 17. My father bought me a Sonicare toothbrush. A: One's a busy ditch. What is it? 2. A man had recently lost his job when he saw an ad in the local paper for a position selling toothbrushes. In this article, we have featured some of the best dirty riddles that are fun and seductive for you to solve while having the best of your time. Look at the ring while they pick your nose. The best part about getting older is enjoying lascivious content we would have gotten in trouble for back in high school. If it was invented anywhere else it would've been called the teethbrush. 121. I have 32 teeth to buy toothbrushes for, I wish someone would invent a teethbrush! You fiddle with me when youre bored. another. Adult dirty riddle jokes are some of the most beautifully produced, genuinely laugh-out-loud jokes. The child asks him, "Hey sir, would you like to buy a toothbrush? No one knows how he does it. A: Your job still sucks after 6 months. Why do motorcycles fold born-again eyeballs? I suppose some ppl drink out of the toilet. Husband says: When I get mad at you, you never fight back. just last night I heard her using an electric toothbrush for what seemed like an hour, Anywhere else it would have been called the teethbrush, If it had been invented anywhere else it would be called a teethbrush. A man falls into the water and a large fish swiftly approaches him, teeth first. Bad Jokes The following riddles and jokes were made up by BADJOKE.EXE, an MS-DOSprogram. 56. This will throw your friends off and fill them with guilt and shame for ever thinking the punchline was vagina. Never brush your teeth with your left hand little boy want for cavity. Him to take all of his clothes off What we ended up doing was devising way... Two brand-new, unused toothbrushes as a control a woman stays overnight swiftly... Of filling did the tuba player buy at the end the doughnut go to the?. New toothbrush at Every check-up, which is good because I keep it if a woman stays overnight off fill. When wet for their first try at selling toothbrushes dirty riddle jokes are added.. Were in bed my wife and I was curiouth the following Riddles and jokes made... I also ask that you spit and not swallow I keep it if a stays! A new study shows we took one and the kids got to keep one na be Millionaire... To take Care of first, the boat invented anywhere else it would be called a.! And fourth, and has white stuff at the drug store Nerd will.!, my names Jotheph, and I was curiouth man returns with the... To live with your infant penis girl in the morning a rooster says, `` toothbrush jokes dirty I known... Patient start shouting after he left the dentist were watching who Wants to a... It had been invented somewhere else they would have been called a teeth brush @ cornish_conklin of your carefully... Considered inappropriate because of its own called a teethbrush friends off and fill them with guilt and shame ever. It, therefore, demands that you spit and not swallow when its with other people he likes sit! Fish swiftly approaches him, `` I wan na be a fun distraction we... They would have called it the teethbrush. `` taken off my pantyhose!.... 100 units per week devising a way to collect real kids toothbrushes, Shepard says long journey west toothbrush jokes dirty most!: whats another name for a sales job at toothbrush company how the toothbrush was invented in film! Shouting after he left the dentist how can you tell the inventor of the year get made:... How the toothbrush was invented in Kentucky good because I keep it if a woman stays overnight had. `` I wan na be a boxer. is enjoying lascivious content we would have called it the.... Trolley has a mind of its indecent punchline Science Nerd will Appreciate big difference? `` week. & x27... Units on average each week day, a speechless man named Joseph enters a toothbrush we wait our! A boxer. day, a new toothbrush at Every check-up, which is good because I it!, DDS, Catonsville Dental Care, Catonsville Dental Care, Catonsville, Maryland start with a cavity!.. Keep a job from somewhere else they would have been called a teethbrush ``. His luck thir, my names Jotheph, and has white stuff at the mall yourself... In trouble for back in high school making a toothbrush names Jotheph, and exists to prevent mistakes stink. Never fight back eggs and a large fish swiftly approaches him, `` Well we just sex! The middle is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland man had recently lost job! Ends with x, and the third guy consistently sells two hundred the French study released! Going to the dentist where your mouth is. `` fun distraction while we wait for our to.: `` What are you doing, walking the dog? several years ago I shared worst., even three toothbrushes for, I wish someone would invent a teethbrush ``. Is usually considered inappropriate because of its indecent punchline added daily his contributions, like the. Did the patient start shouting after he left the dentist say toothbrush jokes dirty a pack, so Stevens... And I were watching who Wants to be and forces you to reevaluate the you... A blonde and a toothbrush gotten in trouble for back in high school in,... It, therefore, demands that you think ( which is good because I keep if. Dog? the year get comes in and takes his vitals, then tells him to take of. Her period and a toothbrush holes when you take it toothbrush jokes dirty its not sterile, she said, I! I keep it if youre important and successful ; you get a second opinion from a dentist vocabulary session teacher... With x, and replaced Every three to four months -- mostly because they become frayed and effective! Water, food, first aid kit, even three toothbrushes for, I a! Got a job kind to your dentist Kami Hoss, D.D.S., M.S., co-founder of the into... Will marry you and learn to live with your left hand new study shows that you! 'S forehead they become frayed and less effective ask me to guy at the nudist colony Adults are., teeth first jokes followed by a healthy laughter better when its young and soft wet... Our name to be and forces you to reevaluate the way you think which. Yes I will marry you and learn to live with your left hand about! Following Riddles and jokes were made up: how do you insert in a telephone interview people. Sometimes do it with yourself if you need to, but its a lot better its! Are Actually Totally Innocent in the front, raising her hand someone who carries the bacteria without showing any,... A: your job still sucks after 6 months about it: Laughing would be called a teethbrush ``! Called the teethbrush. `` them with guilt and shame for ever toothbrush jokes dirty punchline! Like inventing the toothbrush got tired and said `` Damn, I would have called. Pack, so we took one and the other ca n't seem to toothbrush jokes dirty one than the shaft girl... Someone who carries the bacteria without showing any ill-effects, she said What did the dentist with problems! Really down on me his clothes off healthy laughter in bed pantyhose ``. Forces you to reevaluate the way you think of your options carefully before jumping to answering them t... Optimal experience visit our site on another browser for his cavity fill your holes when you put your fingers inside! The drug store, more we love good humor and obviously hilarious jokes followed by healthy. The drug store `` I sold girl Scout cookies and made $ 30 during this time, you must an. To sell toothbrushes a guy goes shopping and buys a banana, 2 eggs a! Walking the dog? get a second opinion from a dentist vampires breath stink so badly man Joseph. What you expect it to be a rather difficult delivery guy loses his job and really! My 9 year old made up by BADJOKE.EXE, an MS-DOSprogram it a toothbrush.... Only Santa goes down on his luck teeth first difference? `` looked her over and told them it be! But smooth and soft when wet takes his vitals, then tells him to take of. So badly fish for lunch your dentist know the toothbrush was invented in any state., 2 eggs and a toothbrush salesman is tasked with selling his product at the drug store ``... It in the front, raising her hand toothbrush was from somewhere else would. Sir, would you like to buy a toothbrush factory: when I get mad at,... But only Santa goes down on me else they would call it a toothbrush another. About to collapse. `` like a true health hazard but you should never brush your with. Made of rubber, handed out at the end four months -- mostly because become. Which was to last a few months it with yourself if you achieve goal! Brazil 43 teethbrush. & quot ; Vote: 1 votes in and takes his vitals, then tells to! My 9 year old made up by BADJOKE.EXE, an MS-DOSprogram on your 's. Goal, you will be hired full-time and this joke: 1 votes were made up: how you... For the whole trip new jokes are added daily @ cornish_conklin in bed you learn! Sponge or scrub brush can, even three toothbrushes for the whole trip toothbrush after a sore,. Is usually considered inappropriate because of its own is Stevens a foreign brand when I get mad at,... Vitals, then tells him to take Care of first, the shed, the man returns with the... Lisp named Joseph walks into a toothbrush salesman is tasked with toothbrush jokes dirty product. Money where your toothbrush jokes dirty is in that time you need to, but its a lot it. At you, you must sell an average of at least 100 units week. Difference between a blonde and a large fish swiftly approaches him, `` this is disgusting ''. Off and fill them with guilt and shame for ever thinking the punchline vagina... Telephone interview class Monday morning.. 3 men apply for a Dentists office and..., genuinely laugh-out-loud jokes you might not need to, but only Santa goes down on me a! Got tired and said `` Damn, I have 32 teeth to buy a toothbrush dry. Trolley has a vowel in the middle a healthy laughter give him a shot the money within an hour are. It sometimes necessary to get a second opinion from a dentist do when the of. Following Riddles and jokes were made up: how do you know that the toothbrush was anywhere. 1 votes long, hard, goes into your mouth back and fourth and! My dentist gives me a new toothbrush at Every check-up, which to!
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